Wednesday, 15 February 2017

The Introverted Mama, Pass the Rum Chata

One of the most difficult things for me about being a wife and mother is that I am an introvert. I am so blessed by my life, by my kids and my loving husband, but there are so many days I feel drained, touched out, tired of being so needed all the time.

Jerome is in a phase of needing to be around me all the time.

Seriously, he will bring his potty into the kitchen so he can do his business in full view of me.

While I make supper.

Today I was trying to have a rest on the couch while he was engrossed in his trains and car play on the rug, and he spent most of that time driving cars on my legs and opening my eyelids so he could show me things.

All the while, talking and talking . . . and talking, to me.


Tonight, as I finished up a few things in the kitchen and returned our main spaces to order, I walked down our hall where my three guys are sleeping behind the three closed doors, and realized I had about a blessed hour of totally-alone time.

This is coveted time for me.

Time I spend writing, blogging, drawing. Time I spend doing nothing more than watching the Good Wife, editing pictures, reading. Maybe I am doing something productive like organizing or working on a Shutterfly album, or maybe I am knee deep in a project.

Either way, it is the small amount of time in my day that I might get to do something, uninterrupted, just because I want to.


Take the Good with the Messy

Do not get me wrong, I really do feel I am in the perfect vocation for me.

Life as a stay-at-home mom is all highs and lows. But they are always with my favorite people, people I could not live without.

There is nothing more rewarding than those moments when the toddler is sitting for an entire snack. Or the baby says mamamama for the first time and squeals with delight at just the sight of me.
Some days I feel we have it together. Everyone has brushed hair and clothes that fit.

And you know, even the challenging days can be good from the right perspective.

Motherhood comes with a lot of dirty fingerprints, and it comes with pooped beds and seven loads of laundry to put away because no one has any more pajamas. It comes with just needing to put the kitchen back in order before I can focus on anything else, and needing to deal with five meltdowns before I can get supper on the table.


Yeah, there was a time I could just make supper and no one was crying at my feet, trying to eat frozen peas when my back is turned. 

Back then I was probably writing, or drawing, or reading while supper cooked. Now I have to eke those moments for myself out of the thousands of others which are sacrificed for the needs of my family.



Shifting Perspective

But I think my life is better this way. When every moment of my day is accounted for, when even the moments I take to relax and unwind are well earned and intentional, I can lay down at the end of the day and know I have really lived it.

Or maybe it is not as poetic as all that.

Maybe the baby is already crying, and I know I should be going to bed because tomorrow is a new day. A day that starts earlier than I may be ready for.

Thank God for small wonders for introverted mamas, like those childproof door handles so I can (quickly) shower while the kids are in their rooms, for coffee and Rum Chata that tastes decadent even while the toddler smears oatmeal from one end of the table to the other

And for Magic School Bus, so I feel like he is not filling his head with garbage while I wash the floor. Or write a blog.

God bless,
Olivia


2 comments:

  1. I know I say this about every post but I loved this one Olivia!! It was so real and refreshing, like it was positive and also genuine and relatable :) I am finding myself becoming more introverted! It is so crazy. #stayathomemomlife

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  2. I also appreciated the laundry picture, it will make every mom who reads this feel like they aren't the only one hahaha ;)

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